Ice, Ice Baby

Well... today was interesting. First of all, I'm on my winter break from school. Work has been slow for the past few weeks, so I haven't had to work. Which is good, obviously, because it means I occasionally have been able to sleep in during my break. It is also bad, however, because I'm spending money like a drunken sailor and have nothing to replace it with. Along with that, the schoolessness and worklessness has lured me into a false sense of freedom, to be brutally crushed next Monday. Well, possibly tommorow even, as I will be buying books. Of course, that isn't really as painful for me as it could be, since I still have scholarship overflow checks coming. Still, book-buying is about the only time college students ever see $100 bills. Well, anyway, as has been established, I'm on break.
So are other college students.
Including a lonely rocket scientist-to-be, who asked a friend to hang out, and then me (because I just had to have my tart remark, even though I could guess at the consequences). We are both to nice to openly refuse, but we are also not interested in quality one-on-one with the guy. Our solution? Maxmize the girl-to-guy ratio. Four of us ended up meeting him for skating downtown, which really was fun even though the skates were crappy. I like skating, and I wish I had some way of taking classes to get more skillz. That and gymnastics and scuba diving and body surfing and snowboarding and ballet and modern dance and the list goes on and on and on. All the things my parents didn't get me into as a child, dooming me to a life of "good enough to get by" in all things physical. So anyways, I've been distracted from the point of this post, which is, a rant about coffee shops.
So after the skating we all head for this coffee shop one of the girls knew about. This involved going the wrong way on a one way street, stopping for a red light in the MIDDLE of the intersection (with a cop directly behind us, fortunately going off-duty), several foiled attempts (due to construction-based road closures) to get across town, and another driving infraction commited in the presence of a cop.
Needless to say, we all were ready for a cuppa. Now, I'm a noob where coffee shops are concerned, especially when I can't read the menu behind the counter since I forgot my contacts (again). I've never been to a Starbucks. The most elegant coffee drink I had previously ordered would be the English Toffee cappucino at Russ's. Luckily for me they had a little flip-style specials menu thing out on the counter, and this mint mochachino thing sounded good. A friend promised me I could get it warm, as opposed to iced. I can't abide iced coffee. Any more than a quarter cup and I am nauseated, as also happens with any variety of tea or soy milk. Anyway, my turn arrives and I cheerily ask for a warm mint mocachino. The guy mumbles something involving "hot" into his headpiece, and the girl on the other end apparently has as much trouble understanding him as I do, as he was forced to repeat himself several times. He then turns his attention back to me, and says something about "Mint Condition" this I knew to be a drink with espresso, and I was (and still am) wary of espresso, since I don't like strong coffee. Is espresso a really strong coffee, or is it just extra caffinated? I was about to let it go, but then I decided that I should start standing up for myself, and should make sure I got exactly what I wanted. Isn't that what these establishments are all about? So I told him, wait, I asked for the Mint Mochachino, and proceeded to show him the picture. He muttered some more on his headpiece and then culled $4.55 from my roll of bills. I moved on down the line, anticipating a mouthfull of warm, minty goodness. Talk started up again, as it will between girlfriends, and somewhere along the way doubt was cast on my drink. The statement about being able to get a warm mint mochachino was retracted, and replaced with the idea that the "Mint Condition" was actually the warm version. Which meant that by insisting on the "Mint Mochachino" I had actually procured for myself a clear plastic cup of what turned out to be mint-flavored brown water textured with little chunks of ice and chocolate chips. I lasted for about half of it, mostly due to the chocolate chunks, but then stomachache and chills set in, from which I am still suffering as I write, even after a restoring bowl of piping-hot homemade potato soup. I feel robbed.
Moral of the story: When in coffeehouses, don't order any of those fancy schmancy drinks. Especially if you're like me--I have a little more experience after tonight, but ordering coffee is an adventure for me, since no matter what I ask for I will be at least a little suprised by the contents of what I end up getting. You will be much better off with a bowl of the soup of the day. Or if you are feeling bold maybe even a plain old mild/medium blend coffee with a hazelnut flavor shot and enough cream and sugar to incite comment.
With that I would like to wish every one a blessed New Year!!!!!! The blog (still) lives!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!